Tuhan Yesus-kan? Kenapa dia mati?
The question came from our youngest little girl, Vivi. She has yet to start school due to some serious miscommunication problems with various schools in town. So instead, she hangs out with us in the morning. She is pure kid: pure joy, pure curiosity, and pure mayhem. Its really easy to get frustrated with her – this is her first time out of her rural village and living with 34 siblings who love to pick on her is probably not the easiest. But as annoying as her constant questions in Malay and constant need to touch me and anything I am doing, she is a breath of fresh air.
She’s not afraid to main bola (play soccer) with the younger boys, and is often found pushing them around. She is blissfully ignorant, and for a while was convinced that our little town Tuaran was KK. She still calls town “Tuaran KK”. Goodness.
The arrival of new brothers and sisters has been a blessing. With a new, younger headstrong student, Lillyana isn’t constantly being yelled at. Instead, she is speaking lots of English, and doing things she is supposed to be doing. And of course fighting with Vivi. But the improvement in her English and especially her participation in class is incredible.
That brings us back to Vivi’s question this morning. “That’s Jesus right? Why did he die?’ I was at a complete loss to answer in any sort of understandable Malay. And English wasn’t an option. So I said he died for everyone, and tried to say something about love, but I don’t know if I used the right word. As per usual, she laughed loudly at my stammering, and Auntie called her into the kitchen to help. Kenapa dia mati? Dia mati untuk manusia kerana kasih. He died for all humans because of love. And I can’t get the question out of my mind. Because Christianity, worship, and fellowship is such a huge part of Jireh Home, I assumed all of the kids already knew the basics. Jesus died for me because he loves me. He is God’s son sent to save us.
In the gust of fresh air that is Vivi, I am reminded that Jesus is more than the basics, more than the answers to seemingly simple questions That the gospel is confusing and complicated, hard to understand. And I am reminded that my life is about embracing that mystery and living it out in every possible way. Learning to understand that sacrificial love from a completely different context.